Impact on families · 2 min read
Boundaries and personal responsibility
Families often feel responsible for their loved one's choices. Understanding where your responsibility begins and ends can be a relief.
What you're responsible for
Your own actions, your own wellbeing, and the safety of any children or vulnerable people in your care.
What you're not responsible for
Another adult's decision to drink or use drugs, or their recovery. You can influence and encourage, but you can't control.
Why this matters
Trying to carry responsibility that isn't yours can lead to exhaustion and resentment. It can also, unintentionally, reduce the pressure on your loved one to make their own changes.
Boundaries as an expression of this
Boundaries put this understanding into practice. They clarify what you will do, and leave space for the other person to take responsibility for themselves.
Key considerations
- This can feel uncomfortable, especially for parents.
- Responsibility for safety never shifts, particularly where children are involved.
- Support groups often explore these ideas in depth.
Suggested next steps
- Read 'Setting healthy boundaries'.
- Use the boundary-setting worksheet.
- Talk to a family support group.
Further reading from trusted sources
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